Tannen Vs. Graff

The most important concept I learned after reading these works is to have an open mind.  It is important to take a stand on what you believe is right, but it is also important to hear from all sides of an argument.  It is believed that most of the time when discussing a specific topic there are only two sides to the argument.  This is not the case for every situation.  Keeping an open mind allows me as an individual to listen to what others have to say while still maintaining my ideas and comparing them to how others feel on a certain topic.  How people go about using words can have a big effect on how the listeners interpret the situation or argument.  In Tannen's piece she describes how some people interpreted a car crash as being severe when really there wasn't even a piece of glass on the ground.  This confusion was the result of a question stated with the exact same words except for the word smashed in one question and bumped in the other.  It is amazing how the use of words can have that big of an impact on a certain situation.  After reading both pieces I believe argument should be respective in comparison to what others have to say, but at the same time a little fire is needed in an argument to make it a legitimate argument.  What’s the point of saying what you believe if there is no enthusiasm behind it?  I do agree with Tannen that some people are military minded and can be hurtful during a heated discussion, but I have to disagree with her when she says that every human encounter can be thought of as a battle.  From what I have observed most people know the differences between small talk and an argument.  I feel that whether something is categorized as an argument depends on the setting.  In a class room I think it’s good to get a little heated on whatever topic is getting discussed.  The classroom encourages argument.  No one’s feelings should get hurt it should just be about listening to others’ ideas and comparing them with your own.  In my opinion like I said earlier, I believe it is a good thing to approach every conversation open minded instead of being narrow minded and thinking whatever you believe is correct.