Tannen vs Graff

After reading both essays, I found that I liked the Tannen one better. I found it to be more interesting and I agreed with a lot of the things she had to say. I learned that there are more than only 2 sides to an argument so before making any conclusions on who’s right or wrong you need to listen to all sides. You should still express your own ideas when arguing but you have to be open to the other people’s thoughts because it may have you look at it from a different point of view.  I think that you still need to stand up for your argument though but at the same time have respect for the other person.

I agree with Tannen on the idea that we don’t think about what some of expressions we say in our daily conversations really mean. When you are in an argument, someone’s word choice could change the whole meaning of what they are trying to say.  I liked when she gave the car crash example. By simply changing the word from bumped to smashed, it gave people a whole different interpretation on what happened. When she used the word bumped it was like no big deal but when smashed was used they automatically assumed it was bad and that when asked if there was glass they answered yes even though there wasn’t. I think it’s really impressive that one word can change the whole meaning/interpretation of a sentence. I also think that metaphors have become a big part of our language without people really thinking of the meanings behind them. People just use them in daily conversations or arguments without thinking. I agree with Tannen that sometimes they can be hurtful when in an argument. For example, take a stab at it or it’s only half the battle. I hear people say these all the time and when you think about it, it’s all compared to war.

I think that the big idea that I got from Tannen’s essay is to go into an argument knowing that there more than 2 sides to it so you have to be willing to listen to other people’s ideas openly. You can’t go in thinking your right and that’s the end of it. The other very important concept that I got was word choice. It is a huge factor in how things are perceived and understood.